Why do we have to be right always?


There have been few incidents in past one week which made me think about this topic.

  • I wanted to get new pair of lenses but when I went to order it, I was told to again get my number checked though I recently had got my prescription. There I got in a healthy discussion (read: polite argument) with the eye doctor about the cost of lenses while buying them online and from a shop. I believed online is cheaper while he believed shops are cheaper.
  • Today morning, I started discussing with a stranger (on Twitter) that how BJP in Gujarat is better than Congress. I didn’t even know that guy nor am I a firm BJP believer (I dont have much interest in Politics). I just have been in an environment where BJP is more preferred & has performed. But that particular guy opposed me and then we started having long discussions.
  • Last night I met an accident, I bumped my car into a bike. No harm done to anybody or anything. The guy was very poor and tried to get some money from me (but he just ended up wasting a lot of time, his as well as mine). After the accident, somebody told me that in India there is a law which says even if the fault is of a 2-wheeler guy, the 4-wheeler guy is supposed to pay for the 2-wheeler guy’s damages; 2-wheeler guy should pay for cycle people and so on (In Succinct: The  bigger vehicle person, even if he has no fault, is supposed to pay). This just ignited a whole discussion in my family where I believed this law (if it actually is) is stupid, while others believed that it is fair. None of us knew if there exists such a law, we were all talking hypothetically.

All these incidents made me start wondering am I the only one with such urges to prove myself right? But then I saw some conversations on Twitter which reinstated my gut feeling that every body wants to be proved right.

Why are we so insecure(or is it really the reason for continuing to prove ourselves right)? Why don’t we just let it go and spare so much of precious time which we end up wasting for a minute of ego boost? (does it really gives your ego a boost?) Why don’t we just give up on such baseless arguments? (Yea, yea, people say we shouldn’t give up so easily but does that apply to such petty things as well?)

Well, I can’t figure out why I used to keep on arguing till I was proved right. But irrespective, I think now on I am not going to involve myself in such stupid and baseless time wasting arguments which don’t do any good to any one.

Btw, more often than not, when such stupidly baseless discussions are about to end, one or both of the involved people use the word “Never Mind”!!! So even though I am bored of the usage of word “Never Mind”, Never Mind!!

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4 thoughts on “Why do we have to be right always?

  1. If we know or believe that we are right then why do we have to announce it to everyone! Ego is the reason for most people. In my case, arguments arise because I am a perfectionist and it pisses the hell out of me when things are not done correctly. Why can’t people just do whatever is needed to avoid arguments! If that poor guy wanted few rupees which would have saved few hours of your time then wouldn’t it have been worth to just give that money! If we know our eye strength and know that it is cheaper online then why even open a room for arguments by going to an optometrist! If your bf is missing you and wants to see your photo then shouldn’t you just send it to avoid arguments! If your bf wants to be in your arms or wants to hear you voice or wants to be romantic with you then why don’t you let him have his way – a way beneficial to the relationship. Why have policies in life which only leads to arguments. Why not spread some love. Our ways of thinking and judgement has been influenced by several levels of our social circle – influenced by family and upbringing; our school, university and work peers; community; city; and even influenced at national level through media etc. A person you maybe about to get into an argument with may have been brought up differently or is from the other side of the planet. Both of you may be thinking that you are correct or can take positive comments wrongly. Key thing is to choose your battles otherwise you will run out of energy. With the ones close to your heart or the ones getting there, have policies that only bring you closer to each other. With strangers, have policies for different thresholds of issues. Don’t get fired up on everything. I have so much to say which is why my comments haven’t been presented in any logical manner.

  2. hello!
    all too often even i find myself in a similar situation… but what i believe is that for most people being right is not so important as not being wrong! i am not talking about really wise people who have achieved sage like aura or fan following etc… but for most people it is way too easy to accept that they are not right than accept that they are just plain wrong. i am an okay debater and i usually observe that whenever someone pitches in a new idea or a notion the people invariably start pointing out the shortcomings first -even without a moments pause or thought process- a.k.a devil’s advocates. and even when they have been hopelessly bested they still persist trying to somehow demerit the idea (defending the stand they took)… this is not by choice but by design. accepting that we r wrong implies superiority of beliefs of the other guy… we are, essentially, our beliefs and being bested here is a big blow. 🙂 another factor is frustration… most people who engage in such baseless arguments are never taken too seriously by the “smart” people. they have this urge to get the next guy in an argument to take them seriously…. they want themselves to count. so they will do everything to prove you wrong rather than prove themselves ah… wel….. never mind! 🙂

  3. If u feel that u ppl are not letting u prove urself right…then do woteva u feel right….see the outcome and judge/prove urselves…..y argue on things when u can always try and c wot happens….as far as politics is concernd….sab chor hain….noone can prove whch party is best….its good tht u dnt have much intrest in it :-):-)

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